"Your thoughts create reality" - Determination comes from within you!

"Your thoughts create reality"
Six Silent Master Images ("From Seven Steps to Inner Power" by Dr Tae Yun Kim)

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=19TpT3K_Fy4
(see at 4:04 min into it)...

The two seconds or so at 4:04min into this video of my Jung SuWon Black Belt testing, might seem like just one break of many - after all, the other candidates break lots of bricks, and even bottles, in the video.

But those two seconds made a huge impact on me.

You see, that girl is me, and a couple years before, when I was testing for Red Belt, Great Grandmaster Dr Tae Yun Kim gave me the opportunity, during testing, to face breaking three bricks with ax kick.

I didn't break 3 bricks that night. I probably broke 30+ bricks--- first the top one of the stack of 3, then the top two, then the top one again, then 2, then none, then 1, then none, then 2, etc. At one point I somehow broke the middle brick in the stack of 3 while the top and bottom ones (all new bricks) remained untouched... I'd never seen that before! But - no matter how often I struck that stack of 3 bricks, that night during Red Belt testing I just couldn't gather together the extra bit of determination or focus needed to break a stack of three bricks in one shot.

For me, from that point to my black belt testing a couple years later, the thought of me breaking three bricks in with one Ax kick was about as believable as snow falling in the Sahara dessert. No way I could do that. It just wasn't going to happen.

It's hard to summarize Black Belt testing in words. It was an awesome mix of emotions (joy, fear, stress, happiness, etc) and techniques (forms, sparring tied to chairs, tied to poles, blindfolded...) but when, at Belt Ceremony, Great Grandmaster had three bricks setup in front of three of the candidates, one of them being me, I suddenly reached the most clear thought of my life:

I am only going to hit this once.

In that moment I felt a singular determination, a total, absolute focus, and a total letting go of any thought or concern for my foot, or pride, or any other emotion.

All three bricks were going to all break, and I was only going to hit the stack once.

Watching the video today, you can see me strike the bricks with an ax kick (not even that high of an ax kick, really), see all the bricks explode into pieces, and see me I jump back into cat stance in such joy and total elation.

I had done it! Before I'd thought it was impossible -- but I had just done it!

I want to thank Great Grandmaster so, so much. When ever I face a challenge, I remember those 3 bricks. I remember my Red Belt testing, where I just couldn't break the stack of three, and I remember successfully breaking them at my Black Belt Testing because of my singular, determined thought - I was only going to hit this once.

I'm not physically that big or tall, nor do I weigh that much. The moment I broke the stack of three bricks, though, showed me that I am not limited by my body, actually, but only by my mind. I can, when my mind, focus, and determination is totally set --- break through any obstacle life hands me.

Pil Seung! (Victory!)

Attachment... stronger than velcro

From "Seven Steps to Inner Power" by Dr. Tae Yun Kim -
"How to Deal with Negative Emotions"
"You may have already carved some negative emotional states, such as anger, worry, resentment, fear, or sorrow, into your consciousness... You may have felt so righteously justified in feeling them that you accepted them and had no intention of letting them go. But whom does this really affect? It hurts only you. Perhaps when you adopted these negative feelings you didn't know that this option would eventually obstruct your growth."

I encountered a case of this this week. About two months ago my immediate family had an anniversary dinner at a restaraunt for my parents. Two days ago one of my younger sisters emailed me that something had been bothering her about that dinner for the last two months and she wasn't going to say anything about it, but finally decided she had to. Basically there was a misunderstanding about the bill, in her view. For two months she couldn't let it go. She even got my other, youngest sister embroiled in it. When my younger sister brought it to my attention I was stunned- first stunned that she'd been harboring it for two months, and second, that she was upset for two months over about $50-80. In a way you could say she sold her soul to the devil for $50-80 because for two months she wasn't generating love or good things, instead she was generating strife, hate, and stress over $50-80.

It made me stop and think about what I've learned at Jung SuWon from Great Grandmaster Dr. Tae Yun Kim about attachments and about communication.

You have to let attachments go to be really free.

My sister was so attached to her view of that dinner and its bill that, in essence, she had let it take her on a wild ride, like a run away horse, for two months.

And, you need to communicate!

If my sister hadn't finally emailed me about it, she'd still be wrapped up in it and would still be letting it affect her.

Emails went back and forth over the dinner and bill and each of our view of that night, but in the end we resolved it. She let her feelings out, I let mine out, and calmed the issue down.

I realized when I'm attached to something, or some point of view, I do the exact same thing. I can let it brood in me until its all out of proportion and then usually find when I say something, that the issue didn't even exist in the other person's mind!

I'm really proud of my sister for finally communicating so we could work on resolving it. Communication is key!

A light moment --- Cooking and training meet!

Stressed today? I was... until I saw this. For a light, fun minute --- take a look at this video. :) It's my favorite this week.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kjCJNw1A0k